{"id":117,"date":"2014-08-13T13:02:59","date_gmt":"2014-08-13T16:02:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/?p=117"},"modified":"2014-10-03T18:37:39","modified_gmt":"2014-10-03T21:37:39","slug":"a-pox-on-encotel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/archives\/117","title":{"rendered":"A pox on Encotel"},"content":{"rendered":"

Going through some old, very old files on some Zip disks I found \u2013remember Zip disks?\u2013 I found this rather curious piece\u00a0I had written back in the 80s. A word of explanation is perhaps necessary.<\/em><\/p>\n

Encotel was the name of the Postal Service in Argentina in pre-privatisation days, and expats like me living in Buenos Aires who had the good fortune to receive packages from abroad had to go down to their International Office on Antartida Argentina and Comodoro Py (this is the junction of two streets in the old dock area). Here you had to queue for ever to pick up your parcel (if they hadn’t lost it), and, what’s worse pay the customs dues.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"37443\"<\/a><\/p>\n

The problem with this was that you had to pay the importation \/ customs fee not just before collecting the parcel, that would have been OK, but before knowing who it was from or what it was. My own particular problem was that being the owner of a language school publishers would frequently send me samples \u2013books, audio and video cassettes (remember cassettes)\u2013 which were not always welcome. My mum and sisters would send presents for the children too, and I had no way of knowing which were which without paying first. And there were no refunds. Incidentally, despite Argentina being a signatory to the free importation of educational materials, in Encotel you still had to pay – but that’s a whinge for another occasion<\/em><\/p>\n

\"bird-kite-2\"<\/a><\/p>\n

And they decided how much. Quite how they calculated custom dues was always a mystery to me. I once received a paper and bamboo Siamese fighting kite something like the one above but rather more artsy fartsy. The customs declaration said in English ‘1 Siamese Fighting Kite’ \u00a0and the guy on the counter asked me to translate. I told him what it was (and explanation was necessary because the translation didn’t really do it for him) and with no hesitation he quoted me a price as if he was used to people importing these items on a daily basis. And the price he quoted \u2013with no consultation of any sort\u2013 was at least twice the cost of the kite in England plus\u00a0the postage.<\/em><\/p>\n

I was always pissed off about this, and one day, having a column to fill in the Buenos Aires Herald, I sounded off publicly. Nothing changed, but it generated a little humorous correspondence. Not quite sure why\u00a0I chose to do this in cod Elizabethan, but guess it seemed like fun at the time. The original text is below – I have resisted the urge to tinker, although should like to.<\/em><\/p>\n

A pox on Encotel<\/strong><\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: Good even, Jorge: Wherefore goest thou?
\nWhy art thou breathless, wherefore starest thou so?
\nFor do I fear so as I love thee well
\nThe stars have shone unwontedly on thee.<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: Tis true, and vexed I am of late, for now
\nHard from that place I come where many hours
\nAre customed men to wait in hope for news
\nFrom foreign climes by th’authorities withheld
\nAnd yet must waste for naught yet pay it dear.<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>:
\nWhat meanst thou? Sirrah, prithee, speak me plain
\nNay, riddle me not, yet say thy meaning clear.<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: Of Encotel I speak, yet, bear not hard
\nThat I should so inflamed inform on this
\nWhich wrongs the state: Oh, what would come on it?<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: Yet speak you now.\u00a0 I bid thee that you stand
\nNot on your love for state yet that I know
\nYou bear for me. I pray thee tell it clear,
\nWhat cause hath brought thy countenance so low.<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: I have a mind to tell thee all, I swear;
\nI’faith I shall:\u00a0 a pox on Encotel.
\nFashion it thus: this day upon the morn
\nA paper through my casement all sealed up
\nDid tell me presently to make repair
\nTo Antartida and Comodoro Py
\nWhere messages from foreign parts had come
\nAnd urged me if I would of this more know
\nPresent myself twixt eight and four o’clock<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: Why, sirrah, then a packet hast received?
\nAnd paid it well, in taxes and in time?<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: Yet let me speak.\u00a0 Would wert it thus, yet hark,
\nIt was not so.\u00a0 Methinks thou knowst the place?<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: Indeed, an’t please you, many a time and oft
\nCause have I had for frequenting that place.<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: Tis well.\u00a0 Then list, for I shall now unfold
\nTh\u2019events which me befell ere night had dropt.
\nWith motive plain came I to Encotel,
\nThe yellow paper firmly grasped in hand,
\nWhere to a table at the entrance plied,
\nA surly fellow was which tended me,
\nSleek-headed, dank and bittered as the vetch.
\nMy papers scarcely glanced at, me he sent
\nT’another table, documents to present.<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: And, so it is, good friend, thou knowst full well
\nThe custom of this land is fashioned thus.<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: So let it be, for ’tis no cause for pain,
\nYet seems it strange to me what next befell.<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: I pray thee, sir, to cut thy story short.<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: That shall I. To a gentleman I hied
\nWhose office ’tis the fees to calculate
\nOn packets here received from foreign lands.
\nWhat price, I asked: he answered twenty-six
\nWith forty cents.\u00a0For what, cried I?\u00a0 Yet hold,
\nThis packet, prithee, sirrah, please inform
\nThe contents what they be, ere I do pay.<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: Methinks thou hast a point: unknowing ne’er
\nShould man his coin dispense without just cause
\nand knowledge full<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: I’faith a jot he cared
\nbut I could pay or thence from whence I came.<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: And, paidst thou, Jorge ?<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: Ay, in truth I did
\nAs curiosity doth master man.
\nAnd nay, why not, indeed?\u00a0 For unbeknownst
\nTo me a packet despatched might have been
\nAnd favourably had chance to be received.
\nYet too methought should one consider on
\nHow men desirous to promote their wares
\nSend unsolicitedly their marketries,
\nThus giving me some worthy cause to wish
\nTheir deeds undone wert I to bear their costs.
\nMy argument presented thus rebuffed
\nSo urged I was to pay or hie me home.
\nBut pray thee, truthfully, I vainly cried,
\n‘Tis meet that I should pay when yet I know
\nNot what tis that I pay?\u00a0 Ye Gods, ’tis strange,
\n‘Tis passing strange, perhaps I want it not.
\nAgain they bid me quiet, again I railed
\nTill blue-robed clods were standing thick on me.
\nI hung my head, I cried in shame, I paid.
\nI ask thee, Manolito, canst be fair?<\/p>\n

Manolo<\/em>: The packet, what was’t, that caused thee all this trial?<\/p>\n

Jorge<\/em>: Ha, why, in truth, tell thee yet I can not,
\nFor seeing only of what ilk it dealt,
\nAnd ang’ring as the flint that beareth fire
\nLeft I it there: ‘Twas trash I needed not.
\nOf all the strange things that have reached my ears
\nIt seems to me most wondrous Encotel
\nThe hard-gained drachmas of a peasant poor
\nShould thus wring from his ignorance, for who
\nIn presence of a packet from afar
\nCan yet resist, or, unresisting, live
\nWith redress all denied tho cause there wert.
\n‘Tis strange, I swear, ’tis strange, yet ’tis, yet ’tis.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Going through some old, very old files on some Zip disks I found \u2013remember Zip disks?\u2013 I found this rather curious piece\u00a0I had written back in the 80s. A word of explanation is perhaps necessary. Encotel was the name of … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-117","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-writings"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/117","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=117"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/117\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3251,"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/117\/revisions\/3251"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=117"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=117"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eayrs.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=117"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}